How Cancer Treatment Changed My Vision – But Not My Independence
Wednesday marked a milestone I wasn’t sure I’d ever reach; I drove a car, alone, for the first time since developing glaucoma as a result of cancer treatment. The experience was both surreal and empowering, filled with a mix of anxiety and exhilaration – a blend I imagine only those who have lost and then regained a kind of freedom truly understand.
The Road Back: Facing the Unknown
After months of adjusting to life with glaucoma—navigating changes in my vision, learning to move more slowly, and battling the uncertainty that comes with a cancer diagnosis—getting behind the wheel felt like approaching an old friend with a new face. The familiar shape of the steering wheel, the hum of the engine, and the open road all seemed slightly foreign. My depth perception wasn’t what it used to be; the world appeared flatter, and distances felt harder to judge. Spatially, everything was weirdly off, almost as if I were seeing through a camera with a warped lens.
Solo, Yet Supported
Despite the strangeness, driving solo felt good—better than I expected. It was a small act with a big meaning: reclaiming my freedom. For so long, I had relied on others for rides (mostly Chris) or had resigned myself to staying at home. Wednesday, I broke that cycle. I was cautious, hyper-aware of every mirror and every turn, but with each mile my confidence grew. I remembered how liberating it can be to choose your own destination, to feel the wind on your face, and to go wherever you please.
A New Perspective on Independence
This drive wasn’t just about getting from point A to point B. It was about autonomy—something cancer and its side effects had threatened to take away. Glaucoma changed the way I see the world, literally and figuratively. But it hasn’t taken away my determination or my desire for independence. Wednesday’s journey was proof that even when life alters your course, you can still find ways to steer in the direction you want to go.
Reflections from the Driver’s Seat
As I pulled back into my driveway, I felt a wave of gratitude—for my health, for advances in medicine, for supportive friends and family, and for the simple joy of being able to drive myself home. I may never have perfect vision again, but I’ve gained a new appreciation for the freedoms I do have and the courage it takes to reclaim them.
To anyone facing a similar challenge—whether it’s vision loss, illness, or another roadblock—remember that the first drive back won’t be perfect. It will be spatially weird, maybe a little scary, but it will also be sweet, victorious, and yours. Sometimes, the greatest journeys begin with a single, uncertain turn of the wheel.
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Our Humble Road 